Finally I found my 'Every Indian Must Watch' video!

Its not very often that I share the content of any other website on my blog. Moreover for the first time I am sharing a video. But after watching this video (courtesy: DeshGujarat), I said to myself, finally I found the video for which one can say 'Every Indian Must Watch'! 

In the video, Dr Swamy is so damn right in saying that the study of Indian law should be made a compulsory part of our education system as it will truly empower each one of us. That suggestion is GOLD !

P.S. Please do share this video and let the true face of UPA emerge ! Whether we are over-reacting with UPA could be discussed in the comments section in a civilized manner.

First video is in Hindi(courtesy: DeshGujarat) and the second in English (courtesy: youth fornation.

Google Maps to use Mayawati statues for directions in Lucknow !

Lucknow. “Head north towards Maya#3899, Turn left at Elephant#23, Pass by the KansiRam#19 and take a final right at Ambedkar#6” was how Google Maps gave directions to Chandru Prasad when he used his Android phone to find out how to reach Pandey Paan Bhandar from his house.
Starting today, Google is planning to use the ever growing statues in the state for the benefit of aam aadmi.
“We have launched our services in Beta stage in Lucknow and we hope to extend these services all over the state once the Indian courts give green signal to Miss Mayawati for completing her statue building projects,” Google CEO told Faking News.
Sources inform that a “statue predictor algorithm” designed by Google engineers had estimated that Lucknow would have a Mayawati statue after every hundred feet by the year 2020.
“This is huge! We don’t even expect street lights or traffic signals cropping up at similar rates; nothing could give a sense of direction in the state better than the statues, and that’s why we decided to incorporate them into our services,” Google CEO explained.

UP CM Mayawati with statues that would give
 directions to the lost citizens in the state

The news has brought an early Diwali for Maya’s supporters in the state capital, and even the Chief Minister herself was happy with the announcement.
“We thank Maanniya Google Ji for taking this noble step that will help the poor people in Uttar Pradesh,” Mayawati read out a prepared statement in a press conference. Later her Chief Secretary informed that the government will provide the required data to Google engineers, and the statues would be meticulously numbered in order to make direction-giving easy and accurate.
Government sources inform that the news has excited Behenji so much that she is planning to build a statue of herself that would be the tallest in the world.
“Taller than the Christ the Redeemer and the Statue of Liberty put together,” a government source informed. Faking News learnt that this proposed tallest statue of Mayawati would be called the “Redeemer of Poverty” symbolizing Maya’s constant concern for the poor.
Besides, the statue will have Mayawati holding an elephant in her right arm, instead of the customary torch. “This is to symbolize her power and stature,” explained the source. Not to mention the other arm will be shown holding her favorite hand-bag.
This decision, as expected, hasn’t gone down well with the Samajwadi Party leaders who have vowed to demolish the statue once they come back to power, even if that means partnering with the BJP for the demolition, while Congress workers are reportedly working on a “counter offensive”.
“They are planning to come up with Gandhi Maps to counter Google Maps; the Gandhi Maps will use all the monuments, offices, roads and other constructions named after Nehru-Gandhi family members as the landmarks for giving directions,” a Congress source revealed.


This post was first published by me on Faking News. Link. 

Karunanidhi to do a Prison Break to rescue Kanimozhi from Tihar jail

New Delhi. If sources are to be believed then India is all set to witness its own real life version of the Prison Break. This time it will be the DMK head Karunanidhi who will do a Scofield to help his daughter and Rajya Sabha MP Kanimozhi escape from the Tihar Jail. 

It should be noted that Prison Break was a famous American TV serial drama in whichScofield rescues his brother out of a prison by staging a bank robbery and getting himself to be arrested and sent to the same prison where his brother has been held until execution on false charges.

Fearing that the option of staging a bank robbery might turn out to be a process in futility as the country’s treasury has already been robbed off with the 2G scam, Karunanidhi is planning to stage a robbery of Rahul Gandhi’s most cherished possession of Italian actress Monica Bellucci’s original pic signed by her.

Inside the jail, Kani has already been informed of the plan.

“Due to lack of court date on Sunday, Kani was relaxing in her cell flipping between Sun and Kalaignar TV while dunking Parle-G biscuits in tea, when she got a visitor. Immediately after she was allegedly told about the plan, I saw her secretly summoning her neighboring cell-mates Madhuri Gupta and Sonu Punjaban,” said the jail warden who was later suspended for allegedly humming the Raja Ko Rani Se Pyaar Ho Gayatune.

Karunanidhi is reported to have smiled
over the idea after being glum for many
days over the election defeat and
arrest of his daughter.

The suspended warden claims that Kani has finalized the role assignment for the escape job on the big day. Madhuri Gupta will grab the role of spying on the prison faculties and Sonu Punjaban will get the job of accepting money from Kani and arranging for the necessary resources.

At one stage Kani had even included Kalmadi, currently residing in Jail number 4 to provide the logistics for the escape but later he was eased out from the plan. It is believed that the pole-vault that Kalmadi procured for prison break, at five times the market price, turned out to be of a very low quality and broke as soon as they tried to jump off in the trial escape.

A senior DMK leader, on condition of anonymity told Faking News, “Kalaignar is confident of pulling this off as much as he is confident of winning the next assembly elections. Besides, compared to the Scofield, Kalaignar has a larger surface area to offer for the tattoo. In fact we are even planning to use the extra area to add the route map of the Tihar Jail canteen where Kalaignar can have his favorite sambar rice and curd in the mid of escape if the glucose levels go down.”

Since the rescue-plan has already been leaked, Delhi police is under tremendous pressure to prevent the successful execution of the plan. Savdhaan Singh, senior inspector at the Tihar jail said, “All the security guards have been given a month leave to watch closely all the episodes of How I Met Your Mother.”

Later, it was found out that a little “oversight” on the part of jail intelligence agencies had caused this goof-up between the television series.

And just in case jail authorities succeed in watching the right series, there is a back-up plan.

“In event of failure, Appa has planned to come out with the truth and name all the big guns involved in the scam. The government could then be forced to ask Supreme Court, which is currently driving the CBI to probe the 2G scam, to stop interfering in the powers of the executive and let the law take its own course,” the DMK source revealed.

This article was first published by me on Faking News. Here is the Link

Kanpur front runner to become the “gaali capital” of India !!

Kanpur. With cuss words i.e. “gaalis” becoming acceptable and valuable in public life thanks to movies like Bbuddah Hoga Terra Baap and Delhi Belly of late, the hunt for “gaali capital” of India has started. And the city of Kanpur appears to have taken the lead with local youth laying a claim over the title.

“At least 68% of the currently used gaalis in movies and parks have their roots in Kanpur,” Rajjan, the newly appointed president of Kanpur Youth Association, Bachelors Edition (KYA-BE) claimed, “and the average age of people in Kanpur who employ maa-behen dialect in day-to-day conversation is nine for males and twelve for females.”

KYA-BE was formed last week to help Kanpur city and dehat win the status of “gaali capital” of India just like Bangalore had earlier won the status of “IT capital” and Kolkata was crowned the “bandh capital” of the country.

“No father in Kanpur gets out of his family car to give gaali to Ravindra Jadeja,” Rajjan said, referring to the television ad for Volkswagen Passat, “Little kids join their dads here and call all cricketers chutiyaas in bindaas style.”

A Kanpur girl was shown using swear words in
a Bollywood movie earlier, something that
reassured the local youth of the superpower
status of the city within the country.

The response to the call has been mixed.KYA-BE president has called on all political parties to support his organization’s demands and help Kanpur get the much deserved recognition.

Samajwadi Party is all in favor of this social uprising and sources suggest that the party is already mulling over launching a “gaali do” campaign against the Mayawati government for having neglected Kanpur.

This has led BSP to oppose the demand while BJP, as always, has still not been able to make up its mind on the strategy to adopt in Uttar Pradesh.

On the other hand, Congress seems to be having some reservations over the issue. Congress general secretary Digvijay Singh was quick to express his dislike, “I am all in favor of keeping a check on one’s tongue (sic.)!”

“Bhaad mein jaaye woh,” Rajjan responded when Faking News informed him of Digvijay Singh’s opposition. The youthful KYA-BE president is hopeful of impressing Rahul Gandhi and is planning to invite Rahul to Kanpur to witness slew of impromptu gaalis that Kanpurians can come up with.

“Let Rahul Baba come, we will show him our talents and force him to join us,” said a confident Rajjan mixing his Chaini Khaini, “If he wishes so, we can arrange for an exclusive group of dalit youths coming up with gaalis. Kanpurians, whether Dalits, Brahmins, Muslims, or belonging to any community, are all one on this issue.”

Activists belonging to KYA-BE claim that if the city successfully wins the title of “gaali capital” of India, this could be its biggest achievement since hosting an international cricket match in 2009. “We are confident and planning for huge celebrations,” said a panting Chhotu who had just chased out a dozen pigs into captivity.

However the going may not be so easy and smooth for the city as motley youth groups in various other cities are gearing up to challenge Kanpur. Sources inform that some groups in Patna and Varanasi have already started circulating ‘gaali cards’ on the lines of ‘greeting cards’ among the residents to set up the mood for the final showdown.

This article was first published by me on Faking News. Here is the Link

Inspired by Behenji and Didi, Mulayam decides to call himself Bhaiyyaji !

Lucknow. Indian politics at the moment looks like a flick straight out of the Rajshri production house with Didi (Mamata Banerjee), Amma (Jayalalithaa), Behenji (Mayawati) and Aunty (Shiela Dixit) in lead roles. While India celebrates the success of these four powerful women ruling some of India’s most populous states, Mulayam Singh Yadav, who is also known as Netaji, has decided to go for a complete makeover.

“With the blessings of Madam (Sonia Gandhi), I have decided to form an alliance with Behenji and become a Bhaiyyaji,” said a rejuvenated Mulayam who has been, for quite some time now, on the wrong side of Mayawati and CM’s post.

Sliding into an introspective mood, Mulayam ponders, “Look, it’s quite clear looking at those four lady CMs that people like leaders who have nicknames that remind them of their blood relatives. And I have been wondering if distributing money during elections or magic of muscle power was on the wane. Thank god I realized this before changing my original ways.”

Mulayam could re-launch himself with such
old pictures in an attempt to rebrand himself

“Sure. Why not? I think my Pappa can become a very good Bhaiyyaji. We’d have realized it much earlier but that Amar Singh confused us by bringing in Munnabhai, who clearly was more of a bhai than bhaiyya,” said Mulayam’s son Akhilesh Yadav, whom friends fondly call Microsoft (Chhota Mulayam).

However, Mulayam’s decision has drawn a strong reaction from the MNS chief Raj Thackeray, who wrote in his column “United India”: Aamcha paksh konatyahi bhaiyachya navala Ji lavnar naay, aani yachi mee guarantee deto (My party will ensure that no Bhaiyya ever gets the honorific Ji behind his/her name. I guarantee that!)

Mulayam’s decision has also left the likes of Lalu Prasad Yadav in a fix, not able to decide upon a suitable family-name, which would get them an entry into the New World Order.

Always at a statement away from controversy, our very own Diggy Raja said, “Trusting people with names indicating blood relations prove that people believe in family power. That and only that is the reason why Congress always sticks to the Gandhi family.”

Last heard, Digvijay Singh was summoned by the Congress high command for the third time in a space of 24 hours.


Bhaiyyaji smileeee........

This article was first published by me on Faking News. Here is the Link