Saturday, August 20, 2011

The Telegraph publishes leaked conversations of the Indian cricketers ahead of the final test!

London. Trouble for Team India just doesn't seems to end. While the team struggles to prevent a whitewash in the ongoing test series after loosing the top spot, British tabloid, The Telegraph has ensured that submission remains the flavor of the season for the English.
In its weekend edition which was published barely hours after the third test drubbing, The Telegraph has revealed some private conversations among the Indian players and the think tank. Although names of those involved are not revealed, but almost every conversation has a clear giveaway. The leak was timely and seemed to be intended to create suspicions, mistrust and cause rifts among the members of the Indian camp whose back is already against the wall. More so, these revelations are certain to once again fuel the Club Vs Country debate and bring to the focus, the greed of both BCCI and the cricketers.
Mentioned below are the transcripts of some of the leaked conversations:

Conversation 1: (Immediately after the 3rd test)
Player1:   Aaila! You really thought it was Multan? (Breaking into uncontrollable hysterical laughter) And what do they say about you? Great hand-eye co-ordination? Excellent eye?? muahahhahahahahah!
Player2:   I have two test triple hundreds!
Player1:   Dhonnnnniiiiiiiiiiiiiii !

Conversation 2:
Somebody from management:   Listen to me and listen to me good, you are not hitting anybody, Narrow or otherwise, for six 6's again in your life! Do you realize the kind of dis-service you have done to Indian cricket?
Player (Staring at the ground in disappointment and murmuring to himself):   Jab tak balla chal raha hai, thaat chal raha hai, Jis din balla chalna band ho jayega..

Conversation 3: (Just before the 3rd match's presentation ceremony)

We were 'this' close to winning,
 had Cook not hit that double!
Player1:   Are you sure you can handle the presentation ceremony this time? I mean you have already touched upon the fatigue factor and injury to important players factor after the first two tests.
Player2:   Surer than I was when I gave that useless pustule the last over in T20 WC. Just wait and watch! Never underestimate the cosmetic importance of a grey beard and dark eye-circles.

Conversation 4:
Commentator1:   Don't you think you went a little overboard with Naseer the other day?
Commentator2:   Unlike you my conscience doesn't permits me to accept a 3.6 crore cheque for nothing.

Conversation 5: (After the series defeat)
Selector 1:   It will be very difficult to get away this time Saar. Could hear so many noises of sharpening knives.
Selector 2:   Everything will be fine. Just make sure Zak remains unfit even for the Champions Trophy.
Selector1(drowned in admiration for Selector1):   Super Saar! But what do we do for Zak's replacement ?
Selector2:   Why is that a problem? We have so many pacers in Morkel, Southee, Bollinger, Bichel ...
Selector1:   My mistake Saar. Forgot to mention I meant Zak's replacement for the ongoing Ind-Eng tour.
Selector2:   Oh! No Sweat! I heard a name of a very promising pacer making great strides in the domestic circuit. Could bowl seam up,down everything. Heard he could bat a little as well. What was his name? Ani.. No No. . Ya Anirudha. That was it. Just bring him on-board straight away.

Conversation 6:
Player1:   Why the hell did you agree in the first place when they asked you if you use Vaseline on your bat? You are so Very Very Stupid.
Player2:   WTF! I thought they were just being warm to me by cracking some non-veg jokes.

Conversation 7: (Speaking on Phone after the 3rd Test)
Coach:   What did you say to me while handing over the job, huh? "This is a great group of players. I can visualize you calling me later to thank me." You SOB! Answer Me......
I'm seeking legal advice against Gary!

Ex-Coach (In modulated tone):   You seem to have dialled a wrong number. Please check the number you have dialled..

Opening Batsman: (In a disgruntled voice) You useless giraffe! We were shown on live TV the other day. I am getting thousands of calls daily asking for a hip-massage.  
Opening Bowler: Just clarify saying that it was our height difference that created the confusion as you thought it was my shoulder and just stop with your girlish complaints!

As damning as the above conversations look like, it is to be noted majority of them have not been revealed by The Telegraph as they contained pretty nasty descriptions of some of the ex-players from both India and England. However, experts opine that the veterans Michael Vaughan and Bishen Singh Bedi have bore the brunt of the frustration of the Men in Blue.


  1. Great Ankur..And welcome back to your own blog where you can view, write and express your own opinions freely.... The best conversation is 7.. Garry himself must be in shocked after seeing Indians performance...

  2. Best wishes, Ankur! Keep up the good work!

  3. Lage raho dost.... gud going..

  4. Nice.Best of luck Sirji.. Keep rocking :)

  5. bole to ek dum jhakas.. tumhe yeh sab Idea aate kahan hai? Jo bhi hai ek dum mast hai... Keep up the good work..

  6. @Anita: Thnx bete :)
    @Anonymous: thnx.. wud be gr8 if u had left ur name..